Music for Seven Choices:Finding Daylight After Loss Shatters Your World

By Ann Rachlin

	Iain Kerr, Ann Rachlin, and Sherry (Photography by Joey Bieber)

Note from Ann Rachlin:  I lost my father, mother and husband within four years.  This is some of the music that helped me through bereavement.

1.  Impact: Experiencing the Unthinkable
Music to soothe, comfort and allow tears

Rachmaninov (1873-1943)  Russia
Vocalise (Piano or orchestral version)
Symphony No 2,  3rd movement

When Sergei Rachmaninov wrote his first symphony, he was so nervous that he sat on the steps outside the concert hall during the first performance. The audience was not enthusiastic and the review in the newspaper the next day was so vicious that Rachmaninov was devastated. He completely lost his confidence and did not compose for three years.  ”I felt like a man who had suffered a stroke and had lost the use of his head and hands”  he wrote later. His ability to play and compose was restored by a hypnotist, Dr. Nicolai Dahl to whom he dedicated the 2nd piano concerto. Soon after the 1917 Revolution, Rachmaninov was forced to leave Russia for good. In the USA he made a phenomenal career as composer, conductor and pianist.

Massenet (1842-1912)  France
Meditation from “Thais”

Jules Massenet kept a diary from childhood and even wrote his “Thoughts after Death”!!

“I have departed from this planet and I have left behind my poor earthly ones with their occupations which are as many as they are useless; at last I am living in the scintillating splendor of the stars, each of which used to seem to me as large as millions of suns. Of old I was never able to get such lighting for my scenery on the great stage at the Opéra where the backdrops were too often in darkness. Henceforth there will be no letters to answer; I have bade farewell to first performances and the literary and other discussions which come from them. Here there are no newspapers, no dinners, no sleepless nights. Ah! if I could but counsel my friends to join me here, I would not hesitate to call them to me. But would they come?”

Chopin  (1810-1848)  Poland
Opus 28 Prelude No. 4 in E minor
2. The Second Crisis: Stumbling in the Dark
Music to combat depression, to relieve insomnia and boost self-esteem

Mozart (1756-1791)   Austria
Piano Concerto K491   slow movement

An unsympathetic employer, forced Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart’s father to stay home and send his young son to Paris, accompanied by his mother. The poor lady suffered greatly on the uncomfortable journey and became ill and died. After her funeral, the thoughtful young Wolfgang showed his great sensitivity by writing two letters to his father and sister in Austria. The first told them that Mama was ill and getting weaker. This prepared them for the second letter informing them of her death.

Barber  (1910-1981)  USA
Adagio for Strings

Samuel Barber’s most popular work,played after the deaths of Presidents Roosevelt and Kennedy and was also featured in the movies  Platoon, The Elephant Man, El Norte, and Lorenzo’s Oil.

Brahms (1833-1897)  Germany
Intermezzo in Eb Opus 117 No. 1

Schubert (1797-1828) Austria
Impromptu No. 3 in G flat major     Andante
3.  Observation: Linking Past to Present
Music to fill the necessary time to be alone, to think and make connections

Canteloube Marie-Joseph de Calaret (1879-1957)  France
Songs of the Auvergne  First Series No. 2  Baïlèro

My husband and I played this song when we lost our much-loved dog, Maestro. Thereafter it became our “good morning” music when we were in our country cottage. My partner and I carry on the tradition.  However anxious or troubled I am, it never fails to calm me and give me space to think.

Brahms (1833-1897)  Germany
Violin Concerto in D major   2nd movement  Adagio-Intermezzo

Rodrigo (1901-1999)  Spain
Concierto de Aranjuez for guitar and orchestra - 2nd movement

Joaquin Rodrigo went blind at the age of three. His loss of sight heightened his sense of hearing and he composed songs, concerti which reflect the vibrant colors of his native Spain.

Dvorak (1841-1904)  Czeckoslovakia
Serenade for Strings
Symphony No. 9 in E minor ‘From the New World’  2nd Movement “Going Home”

Dvorak collected train numbers. When he had to move to the United States where he composed his famous ‘New World’ Symphony,  he missed his wife and family desperately. To make matters worse, his apartment was nowhere near a train station. He adjusted his life by making a switch to collecting ships’ names, memorizing the timetables of all the liners sailing by his window.

4.  The Turn: Turning Into the Wind
Music to restore, to bring hope and strength to go on, to give strength to make new commitments

Beethoven (1770-1827) Germany
Symphony No. 6 in F Opus 68  ”Pastoral”

Ludwig van Beethoven began to lose his hearing when he was twenty-eight. At first he was almost suicidal but it was his music that saved his life. In June 1801 he wrote  ”For the past two years I avoid almost all social activities because it is impossible for me to say to people “I am DEAF”. If I practiced any other profession, it would be easier, but in my profession this is a terrible condition. To give you an idea of this remarkable deafness, I can tell you that at the theatre I must sit very close to the orchestra in order to understand the actors…. Sometimes if someone speaks in a low voice I can barely understand; I hear the sounds not the words. If anyone shouts it is unbearable. What is to become of me, heaven only knows!” Yet in the country near Heiligenstad he composed his Symphony No 6 known as “The Pastoral”. Although profoundly deaf, Beethoven accurately describes the song of the birds (the quail, cuckoo and nightingale) the murmuring of a pleasant brook and a most perfect musical thunderstorm.  After my husband died, I found that listening to the Pastoral restored my own equilibrium   No matter how many times I hear it, it is always as fresh as the first time.

Tchaikovsky (1840-1893)  Russia
String Quartet No 1 in D opus 11  2nd movement Andante cantabile

Tchaikovsky was devoted to his mother.  When she sent him away to school, he was heartbroken. On the first day she accompanied him by coach and handed him over to the Headmaster.  Tchaikovsky pleaded with her to take her with him but she bade him be strong and left.  As the carriage moved away, Tchaikovsky broke loose from his teacher and ran, sobbing after her.  He was hit by the wheel of the carriage and flung into the street. His face streaming with tears, he watched as his mother’s carriage disappeared from sight.  ”The worst day of my life” he described it later. His mother died of cholera when he was fourteen. He never ceased to mourn her. It is said that Tchaikovsky obtained the folksong which is the first theme of the Andante cantabile in his first String Quartet from a carpenter.
5. Reconstruction:  Picking Up the Pieces
Music to encourage change

Borodin (1833 - 1887) Russia
String Quartet No.2 in D major    Third Movement  ‘Nocturne’

The beautiful melody became the lovely song “And this is my Beloved’ in the show ‘Kismet’ with added lyrics by R. Wright/G. Forrest. It is said that Borodin composed this beautiful nocturne in 1881 soon after the death of his composer friend, Mussorgsky

Delius (1862-1934) England
Song of Summer

Frederick Delius was blind and disabled. Unable to walk or use his hands, he had to rely on the devotion of his amanuensis, Eric Fenby who painstakingly took down his music, note by note.   As he began dictating the Song of Summer, he spoke of being on a cliff, overlooking the sea in his native Yorkshire. The roll of the waves below and a soaring seagull were all “visible” to the blind composer and you can see the scene as you listen to this remarkable beautiful music, created in spite of the most crippling disabilities. Without the devotion of the young Eric Fenby,   Delius would have died totally frustrated, many wonderful musical creations remaining trapped in his frail body.

6. Working Through:  Finding Solid Ground
Music to support a change of direction and a new life; to encourage when there are new problems to solve

Schubert   (1797-1828) Austria
String Quartet No. 13 in A minor “Rosamunde”  2nd movement  Andante

This incidental music to the play “Rosamande”. reflects a total change of direction in Rosamunde’s life. The heroine, Princess of Cyprus will shortly return to the scenes of her childhood, renounce her throne and live a fulfilled simple life amongst the cattle and country  people, far from the troubles and discord of state.

Handel  (1685-1759)   Germany
Concerto for two horns in B flat   (The ‘Lento’ is particularly calming)
Concerto for organ No. 13 “The Cuckoo and the Nightingale”

When Handel came to London he had to forge a new life for himself against all odds. At times he faced considerable opposition, had to learn a new language, and eventually, overcome by blindness, still continue to compose.  He was determined to succeed.  He made England his home and is buried with other great English writers, composers and painters, in London’s Westminster Abbey.

Bruch (1838 - 1920)   Germany
Violin Concerto No. 1 in G Minor, Op. 26

7. Integration:  Daylight
Music for living in a new world enriched with memories and the experience of having grieved and knowing you are alive; music to celebrate victorious and creative outcomes gained by actively and fully grieving

Mascagni  (1863 - 1945)  Italy
Intermezzo from “Cavalleria Rusticana”

Rimsky-Korsakov (1844-1908) Russia
Symphonic Suite ‘Scheherazade” Opus 35   3rd Movement Andantino
Composer’s title    ”The Young Prince and The Young Princess”

Rachmaninov (1873-1943)  Russia
Piano Concerto No 2

Khatchaturian (1903-1978) Russia
Adagio of Spartacus & Phrygia  from “Spartacus”

About Ann Rachlin:

Ann Rachlin is one of the early pioneers of music appreciation for children in the UK, and the first performer to introduce “fun” to classical music.  A gifted storyteller, Ann began teaching music appreciation at St. Anthony’s Preparatory School in Hampstead and then, branched out on her own and Fun with Music® was born.

In 1968 Ann met American conductor/pianist, Ezra Rachlin and one year later they were married and moved to Texas, where Ezra had three orchestras in Austin, Fort Worth and Houston. In 1970, under his expert guidance, Ann gave her first concert with full symphony orchestra in front of 3000 children.  When Ezra added the Queensland Symphony Orchestra in Australia,  Ann traveled into the outback where she performed Fun with Music® stories for children who had never seen or heard an orchestra before.

Returning to London in 1973, Ann soon she had a three year waiting list for her sessions, a phenomenon which still exists today. Over the years  she gave 74 performances of “The Life of Handel and the Water Music on a Barge on the Thames”, now available on CD as “Once Upon the Thames”.  In 1986 she performed a year of family “Funtasia” concerts at the Barbican with the London Symphony Orchestra ,with her husband, Ezra Rachlin conducting. Her Music Festival appearances include Bath, Leeds, Chester,  Brighton, Harrogate, Perth and Stratford-upon-Avon.

In 1985 Ann became a recording artist for EMI and now produces her own CDs on the Fun with Music® Limited label under licence from EMI    These include stories of the Russian ballets, Lives of the Great Composers, Musical Adventures and are available  at leading record shops, by mail order and online at www. funwithmusic.com

A successful writer, Ann’s ten “Famous Children” books are best sellers in the USA and are translated into 17 languages, including Indonesian, Finnish, Czech and two Chinese versions.

In Summer 1987 Prince William joined the Juniors and was followed a year later by Prince Harry who entered the Toddlers. They remained with Ann for four years until they went to boarding school. Prince and Princess Michael of Kent, King Constantine and Queen Anne-Marie of Greece, Dame Judi Dench, Jane Asher, Edward Fox and Joanna David, Barry Humphries, Bob Hoskins, Sir Clement Freud, Spike Milligan and Peter O’Toole also number among other celebrities who have sent their children to Fun with Music®.  In her classes today, Ann enjoys having many “grandchildren pupils”, children  of former pupils, in some cases where both mother and father came to “Fun with Music®”.

When Ezra died in 1995, Ann was determined to continue her work, with the invaluable help of Iain Kerr who has worked with her since 1978.  She was the subject of “This is Your Life” in 1996 when Lord Menuhin, Sir Georg Solti and Lord Runcie as well as many of her former pupils greeted her and paid tribute to her life’s work with children and music. As Founder of The Beethoven Fund for Deaf Children, Ann Rachlin was awarded the M.B.E. by the Queen in 1986 for her services to deaf children.

More information from Fun with Music®, PO Box 16975, London NW8 6ZL, U.K. Email: info@funwithmusic.com
Website: www.funwithmusic.com

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Dr. Elizabeth Harper Neeld offers wisdom and practical insights to anyone whose life is in a time of transition, change, grief and loss of any kind. As an internationally recognized and accomplished consultant, and author of more than twenty books - including Tough Transitions and Seven Choices: Finding Daylight After Loss Shatters Your World - she is committed to work that helps lift the human spirit.